A man who said he didn’t want to sell his mother and sister the house he bought when offered the same price he paid 12 years ago gained support online.
The man, u/Puzzleheaded-Rush413, shared his side of the story with popular people reddit Over 6,600 upvotes and 1,100 comments on forum r/AmITheA**hole. Position“[Am I the A**hole] How do you feel about refusing to sell the Starter home to your mother and sister for below market value?”
Original Poster (OP) A 34-year-old says he bought a 1,000-square-foot townhome for $120,000 when he was in his early 20s. He spent a lot of time upgrading his home and it is now worth around $400,000. OP planned to sell his home and put the proceeds towards a down payment on a larger home with a $600,000 price tag. But his mother and sister, hearing that he intended to sell the house, demanded that it be sold.
However, he refused their request, stating that not only was his relationship with the pair not good, but he actually left the state to escape them.
“They keep persuading me to sell the house at a low price and say, ‘They can finally bring some stability to their lives,'” he wrote. It’s pissing me off and dragging my whole family into the drama, half on my side, half on their side, I need an outside opinion at this point.”
Although the real estate market has cooled slightly, because of high interest rates, not bad enough to have to sell the house for less than a third of its value.and but Newsweek It has been reported that some people have tried to use family ties To put pressure on homeowners Until they gave up their homes, homeowners were usually more supported than families looking for free or cheap homes.
Robert Hinojosa, LCSW and Certified Financial Social Worker Said Newsweek If you’re looking for handouts that your family doesn’t want to distribute, it’s important to set firm boundaries.
“Finance and family are some of the worst aspects of life, especially if you have toxic tendencies in your family. Setting the right boundaries means choosing to talk and not talk to your family.” Sometimes, especially when you know what’s safe, “talk about what’s potentially exploitable,” he said.
Hinojosa said that when someone tries to coerce a large family to take one side, “the best thing to do is explain that you don’t have all the information and ask them not to intervene.” And if the conflict is based on a seemingly unreasonable request, it may be helpful to explain the reasons for the refusal.
“It’s surprisingly easy to say no to unreasonable demands, but it can be incredibly difficult to muster up the courage to do so. Simply put, what they’re asking isn’t realistic. And I have to point out why: $500 may seem like I’m living a pretty comfortable life, but my money is strictly budgeted and its We don’t have room, only place it in what is realistic for the person being asked,” he said.
“This is an easy way to understand your point of view and avoid conflict and blame that can lead to escalation of the situation. , can be difficult because of the morals around you, your own ideas about supporting your family, fulfilling your duties around them, demonstrating your own stability and worth, and many other factors.
Redditors sided with u/Puzzleheaded-Rush413 in the dispute.
“[Not the A**hole] All family members on their side are welcome to give them a home or money. Because if you sell at that price, they can turn around and sell it and make instant money. dear,” u/Pomegranate_1328 wrote in the top-rated comment, which received 10,900 upvotes. I think the OP is correct [Not the A**hole] and do not sell. ”
“And the problem is, they probably will too. Anyone who is involved and entitled to literally 300K gifts to their estranged relatives will receive the gift.” For profit, the world doesn’t care how much it hurts those who did them a favor,” u/Lendyman added.
“I made a deal with a former friend for an old snow blower. I was looking for a bigger snow blower because he said, ‘I’m low on cash and don’t want to shovel snow anymore.’80 I showed up at his house with dollars.About a month later, I noticed that the snow was being removed with a shovel instead of a snowplow.I asked him if the snowplow was broken. I sold it for a few hundred bucks.I needed the cash.’.Because a former friend’u/Schwagonia shared.
“[Not the A**hole] Your toxic family (whom you moved out of state to escape) is asking you to give them only $280,000,” u/ed_lv wrote.
“[Not the A**hole] u/Lia_Delphine wrote: “Why should I lose my profit on a house I’ve worked so hard to pay the mortgage on and done?” Paying for a new home out of your own pocket. increase. ”
Newsweek Asked u/Puzzleheaded-Rush413 for comment. We were unable to confirm the details of this case.
If you have a similar family dilemma, let us know at [email protected] You can ask an expert for advice. your story Newsweek.